Movie recommendation; 45 years

45 Years is a 2015 British romantic drama film directed and written by Andrew Haigh. The film is based on the short story "In Another Country" by David Constantine. The film premiered in the main competition section of the 65th Berlin International Film Festival.[5]Charlotte Rampling won the Silver Bear for Best Actress and Tom Courtenay won the Silver Bear for Best Actor. At the 88th Academy Awards, Rampling received a nomination for Best Actress in a Leading Role. (Via wiki)

*SPOLIERS AHEAD*

45 years trailer drew me in. A movie about life, love, loss, and human connection? Yeah that has Maggie Lopez written all over it.

It was much more than I expected. It teaches us that grief is forever. And just because someone dies, doesn't mean we ever truly move on. In this story we meet Kate and Geoff. They were married 45 years and to what has always seemed like the perfect love story.

Within the first 10 minutes of the movie we learn that Geoff lost someone in the 1960s. At this point, we do not know much about her other than it's a woman from his past. They found her body which had been frozen this whole time. Whilst researching this movie, I actually found out that this was inspired by true events.

If you have the time and want a heartbreaking but interesting read; https://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/11832861/The-true-story-behind-the-story-that-inspired-45-Years.html

“It’s a reversal for how it should be, the young man and the old man,” Constantine tells the Sunday Telegraph from his home in Oxford. “Everything I’ve ever written is based on a concrete image – and that young man frozen in the ice is particularly haunting.”

Really sad and interesting stuff. I could not imagine dealing with that. It's a story worth checking out.

So after learning about finding this mystery woman's body, Geoff starts learning all that he can about global warming.

A day passes and Kate starts to push deeper into who this mystery woman was. Geoff lets it known he was her next of kin as people thought that they were married and he had hoped to marry her at some point in his life.

This is heartbreaking to take. So she pushes more as time passes. Some details he shares while others she finds on her own.

I read a lot of comments about the movie with people saying "Why would a relationship from half a century ago ruin a 45 year marriage?" And through most of the movie, I kinda asked myself the same thing because a lot of the clues were really hidden to me. But after watching it a second time it was like wow... I could not imagine living that way.

Kate in her snooping finds out that the woman, Katya, was very pregnant at the time of her death. Geoff had once said he never wanted children. But he never told her that this was the reason why. Kate and Geoff have a Dog as a replacement for Children, a GERMAN shepherd. Katya was German.

When he has made love to Kate in the past, he keeps his eyes shut implying that he is thinking of Katya'......and Kate realizes this the last time they made love and she tells him to open his eyes.

Geoff considers going to Switzerland and trekking up a mountain to see the frozen body of 'Katya' and yet Kate gently reprimands him that he has never even gone for a walk with her. We also learned how well traveled Geoff and Katya were. Going to places and doing things he never would with her.


At their anniversary party, it hits on Geoff that he has been very cruel to Kate. He has been cheating on her with a ghost... and he does actually love her, just not in the deep and profound way that he loved Katya. His toast was probably the first time in their 45 year marriage, he has acknowledged just how much Kate really does mean to him. Gives a beautiful speech.. even cries. But it would seem it was too little too late.


45 years is currently available to stream on netflix.